Dream

I long to write something so beautiful
that the words collide and crashes
into a haze of stars,
beneath an icy surface.But my view is glasslike 

and I don’t feel fit to wonder
so I lay my head
and I fade away.

Away into a place

where the snow falls soundless
as if without soul
bound to stay or melt.
This is where I lay
and this is where I am capable
to dream
to exist.

Dots keep forming behind my eyelids
like tiny lights strewn
pretty as a picture
full of pain.
I can’t help but wonder;
are these tears falling
possibly captured
in the midst of me.

No place like here,
air to breathe under water
no such thing as a tragic flaw
for it is my creation.
I’m sorry that you shall never know
how far the world stretches
in my mind
you shall never overcome.

Stillness now;
fragile as decomposing bones
about to stray into the sun
keep it quiet.
Keep it lingering
in the corners of my mind
where no one comes
where only I seek shelter.

Blue Moon

I wait for night
to pour its liquid black over me
darkness to be
seldom eyelids to cover.
I yearn for the stars to show
flutter their way across the sky
what I dream might be a lie
but it keeps me alive in the gutter.

A moon in bloom
flowers depicted on her pale skin
her bones tell tales of sin
done by us.
Her heart is heavy
lonesome and awake in space
her world is a crowded place
yet lonely she is.

I rest my head
blindly and exposed
with my eyes closed
because it is heavenly.
There shines a faint light
yet I can taste the blues
no use
hiding behind these pearly whites.

I blossom and awake
to the sounds of seagulls’ cries
whilst a piece of me dies
I’d rather stay in heaven.

Ghosts

The air that I breathe is frozen
it shapes like faces with every breath
a game of hide and seek with shadows
a peek out the window reveals a cruel death.
Cluttering fingers caress my throat
as my footprints blends with snow
under my feet forms a temporary stamp
here, dancing under the streetlights glow.

I hear her moan in the darkness
someone is crying by the curb
I hear stilettos stomp behind me
but they don’t belong to the voice I first heard.
I bleed with her in silence
reach out for her smile
but I pull my fingers through a foggy cloud
in front of me standing a blue eyed transparent child.

Colors and glistening lights
a lonesome echo; nothing
alone in the snow forever
I need to fall for something.
She fades before me
a blurry cloud
I cover my ears
but she screams so loud.

Found my way to a bar
found my way home
quench my thirst in cocktails
anything to not feel so alone.
Fell asleep to die
slip away in smoke
first love left me by the staircase
I remember every word he spoke.

Lonely ghost – turn away, go home
let me wither in alcohol
throw up my guts and laugh out loud
I used to live in a fishbowl.
Let the music set me free
let my shoes take the lead
high
I challenge life to sweep me off of my feet.

Nightfall

This is the core of your existence
a crimson death
one last thought survives
written on paper
children’s laughter, young adult cries.
The pain is handheld
crushed by fingers
black as coal
burns like fire
sorrow lingers.

You saw dust
I found water
in the mist of hope
lips of spoken madness
I remember the hate you spoke.
We’re lost by broken clocks
where hands don’t turn anymore
we’re hours past
we are where seconds stumbled
we used to be the last deadly blast
into nothingness.

Solitude is where my heart is
trapped in the eyes of lonesome ghosts
at night as I fall away
and close my eyes
I let you go and I erase the day.
Swallowed by muddy swirls
still and comfortable
in the wind
I blew kisses in your direction again
the waves will take you in.

It's still beats

For the first time,
in ages, I felt
the caress of flowers upon my cheek
in crisp air, I melt.
I blew a kiss to the clouds on my way
because finally I saw
the blue sky beyond
 it’s been such a long dull war.

A door has been locked for so long
I wear the key around my neck
I had a peek inside
must admit what I saw, looked like a wreck;
nothing we can’t fix
what is broken, what has been torn apart
on a pillow in the dark
my fragile, yet beating heart.

Writings on the wall
“when you wake, you’ll be okay”
I guess I must have woken up now
it’s a brand new day.
I took my heart
and I popped it back inside
no need to tell them now
no funeral to attend
I never truly died.

Floating

So, the wind is crisp tonight
she dropped her coat on the doorstep
she ran towards to light
while reaching for the white scars she kept.
She said, “wind, calm the fuck down”
dancing in streetlights
“I can’t see a fucking thing when you push me to the ground”
she stumbled upon the best place to hide.

Drunk again
quotes written on bathroom doors
the rum would be her friend
rum will sleep with her on dirty kitchen floors.
Awake late at night, crumbling
heartache and painkillers; gloomy days
she’s so reckless, she tumbling
dying inside in so many ways.

Can’t bear to pick up her broken ego
so many roads to follow
so much resistance from winds that blow
 beside herself,  frozen in time, hollow.

I consider this; truth

Imagine
swallowing the sea
while swimming for dear life
in a swimsuit designed for sinking.
Head
lifted to face the sky
tasting rainbows
while choking on hidden treasures.

Life
is meant for greater things
like emptying a gun
into the face of a traitor.
Lies
you’re deceived
we live
to love.

Bite
marks formed upon skin
it hurts at first
scars are forever.
Blow
out the lights
start over
you’ve lost it.